At this point in history, with the depths of the oceans plundered by James Cameron and the most obscure of the Amazonian tribes wearing Levi 501's, you would think that all the different types of gemstones in the world have been discovered right?

Paul Smith? Nope, these bad boys were scraped up off a factory floor

Well, it seems Gems TV is regularly discovering dubious new gems in untapped veins of 'uncrediblique' or rich deposits of 'madeupite' but these are really just brand names for poor quality, artificial or treated existing gemstones so they don't count and Gems TV should be hauled over the coals for conning shoppers out of their money for something that is essentially worthless.

This looks like it belongs on the wall of a first year art students bedroom

Fordite, on the other hand, sounds perfectly believable conjuring images of Icelandic children panning for shiny stones in shallow streams... but the reality is much less romantic. Fordite a.k.a. Detroit Agate a.k.a. paint slag is a worthless byproduct of the motor industry; it is layer upon layer of enamel paint that has accumulated in the spray shops. Modern factories use electrostatic techniques to apply paint so this stuff is in limited supply.

To be fair, this stuff is quite interesting to look at, although I would wait 50 years before buying it so studies can be undertaken on the long term effects of constant close proximity to a potential carcinogen.

Historic preservation of one of Boy George's 'coke spoon' fingernails

The angle here is that this is an “eco-friendly alternative to traditional gemstones”, however this should surely read 'actual gemstones' as paint slag is as much a gemstone as I am a satellite orbiting Saturn. As mentioned above, this particular marketing is following a trend started by Gems TV (and the like) where by they sex up something intrisically worthless by giving it a fancy name and saying it's rare.

You know how it is; you think you look Ferrari Testarossa but really you look Chevy Nova

If you want to feel confident that you aren't going to have your trousers pulled down when buying jewellery, you really ought not to be buying it from a television channel when the price has literally just dropped from £18,000 to £14.95 + P&P in that last 10 seconds, or from any other source than a respected jeweller.

All of Arthur Read Jeweller's staff are trained by the National Association of Goldsmiths and each member has at least the Professional Jewellers Diploma (PJ Dip) qualification which means our customers can be sure of accurate and informed service.